Saturday, December 11, 2010
Malay Wedding.
A Malay wedding is usually performed when either one or both spouses are Malay. The traditional wedding ceremony is in two parts. The first part is the akad nikah (marriage contract), which is the legal and religious part of the wedding. The second part is the bersanding (enthronement), which is a family celebration. It is usual for the two parts to be celebrated over two days. However, it is becoming common for there to be a gap between the parts of the wedding, during which the couple are legally married, but saving up for an elaborate bersanding.
Adat Merisik (Spying Custom)
The adat merisik (asking ceremony, or more literally 'spying custom') is the traditional Malay system for arranging marriages. When it is time for a young man to get married, his family will look around to identify a number of potential brides. But nowadays the man might suggest to his family who he would like them to consider, and it may be a romantic link already exists between the couple. Having decided upon one particular woman, the merisik, or investigation process, will takes place.
For this ceremony one or more wakil (representatives) of the man's family pay a friendly visit to the family of the woman whom they have in mind as his potential bride. The visit is for the purpose of further investigation, and it gives the visitors the chance to see the woman. A hint will be given to her parents regarding the purpose of the visit, and their reaction will be assessed. The woman's parents may also give the visitors some idea as to whether or not their daughter would be interested in the match. The merisik does not constitute a formal proposal. Following the visit both sides can begin to think more seriously about the possibility or otherwise of a marriage. It is possible that no progress may take place, and the man's parents or representatives will then look for another possible bride.
Picture credit(s) to : http://www.flickr.com/photos/wanzai99/4391352858/
Adat Bertunang (Engagement Ceremony)
The adat bertunang (engagement custom) is normally held at the bride-to-be's home. Usually, only the bride-to-be will dress up nicely and beautifully as the guests will look and take pictures with her, the groom-to-be will only wear a usual baju kurung . This ceremony is to ensure that the bride-to-be is no longer available to other man out there as she has someone to protect her.
Akad Nikah (Marriage Contract)
A Malay wedding begins with the akad nikah ceremony. The groom signs the marriage contract infront of the Kadi (and agrees to provide the bride with a mas kahwin (literally 'marriage gold' in form of money or goods or anything as requested by the bride). The contract signing is done before a religious official and is accompanied by prayer. After that, their hands are dyed with henna during the berinai besar ceremony. The bride's hair is also trimmed or being put on make-up by a beautician known as the mak andam. Women/Bride will also put on their 'tudung' or hijab to cover their hair and a 'selendang' or beautiful embroidered with beads scarf on top of their hijab. A crown is also placed on top of the scarf.
Picture credit(s) to: http://blog.fatiniz.com/?cat=18
Picture credit(s) to : http://www.flickr.com/photos/lanraga/1013137642/
Picture credit(s) to: http://blog.fatiniz.com/?cat=18
Bersanding (Enthronement)
The bersanding (enthronement) ceremony begins with the groom's procession with friends, relatives, musicians and people waving bunga manggar (palm blossom) to meet the bride. Often various good-humoured attempts are made to waylay or stop the groom from getting to the bride. The main part of the bersanding involves the seating of the bridal couple on a dais and sprinkling them with yellow rice and scented water by family members, relatives and guests as a sign of blessing. Each guest will receive a bunga telur (egg flower), a decorated egg with a fabric flower, as a sign of fertility. The couple are considered royalty for the day, and so various royal customs are performed for them, including *musicians playing court music and 'bodyguards' performing a display of pencak silat (traditional Malay martial arts).
*musicians playing court music is referring to the KOMPANG, that is a small hand-held rebana used by the Malay cultures. It is most commonly used to announce the arrival of important guests, such as VIPs, as well as to celebrate Malay weddings. Kompang is said to have originated from the Indian Muslim community and was introduced to the Malays during the Malacca sultanate period. It is usually performed in groups, they can be sitting down, standing or walking. At the same time, they will sing our prayer song.
Picture credit(s) to : Yanaa Elfydee
After the bersanding (enthronement) ceremony.
After the bersanding ceremony, the wedded couple and their guests attend a celebratory feast called the makan beradab (formal meal). This involves the bride and groom feeding each other sweetened rice. The celebrations are concluded by posing for family photographs.
Picture credit(s) to : Yanaa Elfydee
Indian Wedding
INDIAN WEDDING CEREMONY.
Indian weddings are very bright and colorful events, filled with ritual and celebration, that continue for several days. They are generally not small affairs, with anywhere between 100 to 10,000 people attending the wedding ceremony. Oftentimes it is possible that many of the attendees are unknown to the bride and groom themselves. Though most Indian marriages are arranged, some couples in urban areas have what are known as "love marriages", where the partners decide to marry each other without family involvement or assistance. The traditional Indian wedding is more regarding about two families being brought together socially, with much less emphasis on the individuals involved. Many of the wedding customs are common among Hindus, Jains, Sikhs and even Muslims. They are a combination of local, religious and family traditions.
Pre-wedding Ceremony
The first significant pre-wedding ceremony is when the two families meet to confirm the proposed marriage. It is done in the presence of elders and sometimes a priest. Then, a few days before the wedding, there will be a bangle-ceremony where the family of the bridegroom went to the bride's home with bangles for the bride. It is also now that the hands of the bride are decorated by henna or mehndi.
Next is the smelting of gold for the thali, which is the one of the most revered symbol of marriage (along with the red pottu). This is performed as close to the wedding day as possible since the bride and groom traditionally cannot meet again until the actual wedding day. The smelting is performed by a goldsmith. A small nugget of gold provided by the groom is melted and used to form part of the thali. A few days later, prayers are held at the bridegroom's home with the thali. A similar henna-decorating ceremony takes place for the bridegroom.
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picture credit(s): York Place Studios Professional Photography |
picture credit(s): http://www.weddingandsongs.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/indian-wedding-songs-2.jpg
Wedding Day Customs
On the actual wedding day, the groom's relatives will go to the bride's home and accompany her to the temple. Meanwhile, the groom arrives with the best man, usually the bride's brother, and followed by three matrons, each carrying a tray. One tray contains three coconuts, with their husks removed.
When the groom and best man are seated, the priest will begin the ceremony with chanting and blessings. Then he will tie a piece of cord round the groom's finger. About half an hour after the start of the ceremony, the bride arrives. The couple sits on a bench in front which placed on the floor, are two kuthu-vilakku or "lamps", a ceremonial fire and various trays containing fruits and flowers. At one point during the ceremony, the priest will tie a piece of cord around the bride's finger to bring her into the ceremony and to unite her with the groom. The sari and thali which are given to the bride by the groom are blessed. The bride then leaves the hall to change. Dates, rock sugar and saffron rice are handed round to all the guests during the bride's went to change. The garlands that the couple will wear afterwards are also sent around to be blessed by the guests.
When the bride returns in her new sari dresses, the groom ties the thali around her neck. The musical instruments started to play and the saffron rice is thrown at the couple as blessings. The married couple then exchange garlands. The couple now walks round the ceremonial fire three times, throwing a handful of grains into the fire at each circling. This keeps the fire burning and is symbolic of the eternal flame of love. During the circling of the fire, the groom will place the bride's foot on a stone and slip toe-rings onto his bride's toes. The priest then asks the bride to honour, love and obey her husband.
picture credit(s): wedding and songs
